The Old Lands OTS 3.0

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It is hard breaking for any human to discover that the partner you trusted has actually dumped you.
It's heart breaking for you, it's difficult for them, however if you really jump the gun in public place or in front of your neighbours, it’s strips both of you from your own dignity, and quite frankly, it’s unfair for the innocent person caught in the crossfire of your public slanging matches.
With little reflection about the consequences before the action, can save both of you the indignity of the hasty gun jumping action. There is a way to leaving a relationship in a dignified way and such action leave you with long lasting feeling of acceptance and peace. It avoids needless drama, and you justify that you are not only a dignified human, but also civilised human being.
Ending Relationship via SMS?
No, no, it is disrespectful to you and the person you loved.
Ok, what am I supposed to do?
Make sure you mean you want to leave the relationship.
Build your courage while visualising how you want to say it in a way that is respectful. You tell her. You break her heart. You apologize. She leaves. You think is all over? She falls into pieces asking you to take her back. You resist. She moves on. Does this sound familiar? I bet ya it does.
Say what you heart desires, and do ensure your decision doesn’t contain uncertainty because you do more harm than good when you leave someone hopeful about a hopeless relationship. Say it kindly that it really is the end. Determine that your decision about leaving her is not a temporary one. Ending is a 'process not an end in itself - Ending is a beginning of a new discovery. You may have gone through difficult stages, and you came out of it not as bad as you thought before the breakup.
But, it's over! Can’t you hear me?
No need to be aggressive or angry when you’re telling her it is over. If you haven't been through a breakup – change your perception of it and accept it as part of your journey – what you resist persists, so crying on her cell phone is undignified, and only enforces her belief that you really want her back.
When you are certain you want to end it, like NIKE says “Just do it”. The sooner you end it, the sooner you free her from the bondage of emotional constrictions derived from false hopes.
Holding on to a hopeless relationship will only lead to conflict, resentment, and unhappiness
And starting an affair so you have someone to 'hold on to' is a sign of behavioural disorder and insecurity
Leave her instead of torturing her
Remember, you can still love her… by telling her the truth and liberate her from bondage of fear and uncertainty
After all, you said ‘I love you’ and shared precious moment with her. If you agree, then, doesn’t she deserve your respect? Then, “Just Do It” face to face, and in a civilized way instead of sending childish sms, emails,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], or updating your Facebook status. ‘ I am Single Girls!’
How Do You Face Her About The Truth?
? Planning your script in advance,
? rehearse it if you have to,
? visualise it,
? Plan it as if you working on a script for a movie
? Make the ending of the story as smooth, therapeutic, as easy as possible for her
? Think of a place to discuss your ending relationship away from romantic places you have taken her to before
? Give her more notice and make sure you time your meeting with her for no more than an hour and half. Talking forever will only lead to false hopes.
? Don’t take her to coffee shop unless you don’t mind a splash of espresso on your face
? Be selfless and non judgemental when she is expressing her anger
? Act as if you are a therapist but don’t over do it to a point you irritate her
? Let her express her anger, while you agreeing with her, and remain apologetic, because, after all, you are the one dumping her
? What you say matters little as opposed to how you should say it
? Don’t talk at her, talk with her, and let her do all the talking after the hurtful news
? Avoid the blame game, it doesn’t work, it makes things worse
? Don’t try to put her down, instead, say something like ‘ I don’t deserve
you, I lied to my feelings, I just couldn’t feel or click , and I am sorry’
? Don’t let yourself carried away and deceive yourself into thinking by giving her ‘the one last minute ‘intimate session’
? Make sure you tell her in advance that you only have 90 minutes and that you must rush to an important meeting or interview. It has to be a valid and persuasive reason. Never, mention your ‘hot date’
? Prepare for the worse instead of expecting that she can accept you as a friend
? Make sure you end the meeting courteously and don’t give her the impression you are rushing to meet your ‘hot date’
That’s it for now, until you read me or see me again, may you both find peace, love and happiness.